No safe harbor

I yelled as best as I could to my wife to call an ambulance. We had just finished dinner, and all the kids and grandkids were visiting. Suddenly and without warning, I simply could not breathe.

I do not remember the ride or the arrival at the hospital

I do not remember my wife waiting for 2 hours while I was in the emergency OR. I do recall waking up in a pressure mask in the ICU, my wife at my bedside holding down my hands to keep me from ripping off the mask. Her smile reassured me that I was OK for now.

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So what was wrong?

Pneumonia had set in and I had simply struggled through what I assumed was simply another difficult day in my life. I chalked it up to growing old, and shortness of breath was merely a symptom of it. While in the ICU, scans were ordered and made, of course, and a large nodule was found on a lung. I met at that follow-up a wonderful pulmonologist who continues to work with me, and he wanted to do a biopsy. I have never had any serious anything done to me in my 62 years. A broken bone here, stitches there, but nothing life-threatening. I am one of those folks who are the 2% population. If it can go wrong, it will. I was not disappointed when the biopsy resulted in a collapsed lung.

Grateful for what I do have

3 pneumothorax operations later, and a lot of therapy, a year and a half of adjusting to this new lifestyle, and here I am. Banged, bruised but not crushed in spirit and with the hope that I can continue now to see the sunrise in the morning and feel the wind on my face. And with me, through it all, is my wonderful wife. I pray that everyone has someone in their lives who really understands and is dedicated to you like I have. She is better than I deserve.

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