Some Dreams Have Come True
So often talking with COPDers, the discussion goes to what they can’t do anymore, how they failed, let themselves down, let others down, and so many other things. Depression and anxiety seem to affect many. So I guess that’s why I look to those areas to help others the most, and some I encounter myself.
It’s easy for me to say that my dreams won’t come true.
I lost some of the things that I always wanted to do and will never be able to do them again. What? What did I say? The answer to this came to me this morning while I was doing laundry. Wow, now I had to figure out what I was thinking and why. It’s amazing how the mind thinks.
It came to me that so many of my dreams have come true and they continue to do so. I just didn’t expect to have it come to my mind as I was putting a bedspread in the washer. My mind works best when I'm doing something that takes no thought.
A dream of mine has always been to move to the Black Hills of South Dakota. That is God’s country. We had that opportunity in 2004 when my husband took a job working at a Sheriff’s Dept. I got the most awesome job, working for their ambulance service. I was an EMT and passed to and EMT-I. I was taking paramedic classes, which I ended up dropping because of health reasons. I cried when we moved. That was the most amazing time and I loved what I was doing. I had stayed so busy working and my husband was too. We moved to my hometown in 2006 and a year later, back to Chamberlain which is where my husband and I met. He got his police job back.
For a long time I have been so upset because my dream was being someplace else and doing something else.
I’ll never be able to have them again! Is that how some of you feel? What dreams have you had?
I had wanted a dream to come true and it did, they did and multiplied! I wanted children and I do have them! I wanted to work ambulance and I did. I wanted to live in the Black Hills and I did. I wanted to live and work on a farm and I did. I wanted to have horses and I did. I wanted to have dogs and I do. I wanted to bring joy at Christmas by baking for all families and I did. I wanted to live by the river and I do. I wanted to be able to fish and hunt and I did. I wanted to make a difference to others lives and I think I did. I wanted our kids to have something/someone in their lives who would be good to them and be there for them, and they did/do and some are working on. I wanted to find someone who I could love and would love me, that would accept and care for my family. And I did/do. He is the best husband and the man of my dreams. 14 years. I continue hoping and praying that my granddaughter is found safe. She’s been gone for 11 months. Yet, I hope, pray and dream that she will be able to come back to us.
That’s a lot of I’s. But to look at myself, it has to be that way. Looking at that list, all but two of the dreams have come true. When I hoped and prayed for each dream, I didn’t say that I want it to be true forever. I just said that I hope and pray it comes true.
Now, I need to let go.
There is satisfaction in knowing that I did it! I lived it. I need to rejoice in that and find peace. It’s time for new thoughts and dreams. It is more difficult now because of health issues, but there is a whole world out there where dreams can be found, with things that I can do in spite of myself and my health.
COPD isn’t a death sentence. We are still on a journey of life. There are still things we can do and that we can dream about. We just need to change the perspective.
Record your memories. Make a scrapbook or a photo album. Do it for yourself. Do it for a family member or friend. Share your pictures and memories, fulfilled dreams live on forever. I can’t help smiling whenever I think of memories, those from yesterday and today, those that will be made tomorrow. Never quit dreaming. Dreams Have Come True.
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