Romancing a Cigarette, Part 2

Cigarettes are liars! Over the years I would try to quit smoking, but it was short-lived. Too often there would be a trigger and I would start smoking again. When my grandpa passed away from lung cancer, I started smoking again after six weeks of not smoking. You see, cigarettes are liars. They don't help us to feel better, they just make us think we do. That's why they are so addictive.

I was going to quit

Short of breath, I was going to quit cigarettes. When cigarettes were raised to $1.00, then $3.50, I was going to quit. When my kids learned that cigarettes were bad and brought home a letter home from school, I was going to quit.

Did I mention the Marlboro man?

No? He was good looking, muscular, and on a horse. The horse was my favorite. I didn’t smoke Marlboro, I smoked Winston regulars. Later on, Doral regulars, since they were less expensive.

I met the love of my life

I met the love of my life in 2003. My guy was a non-smoker and happily took my cigarettes from me when I handed them to him. July 23, 2016 was my quit date. I’ll always remember that date since it was my granddaughter's 5th birthday. I didn’t even plan that!

I was smoking 3 packs a day

I was smoking three packs of cigarettes when I quit. I often caught myself smoking one cigarette and burning another in an ashtray. I like to think that I didn't actually smoke that many. Maybe I gave myself second-hand smoke as well.

I quit cold turkey

After 20 years, I quit cold turkey because I had Barrettes Esophagus, which is a pre-cancer of the Esophagus. In 2002 I ended up in the ICU because they thought I was having a heart attack. It turned out that I had a severe case of GERD or Reflux. That’s what caused Barrettes. I was short of breath more often and had chest pains. So here I was, afraid of cancer of the esophagus and lung cancer.

I finally went to the doctor

It got so bad I could hardly walk from the car to the house. We moved to the Black Hills for both of our jobs. I would get so short of breath. I finally went to the doctor and asked if maybe it was the altitude. He had me see a specialist and an allergy doctor who diagnosed asthma and severe allergies. I gave myself weekly injections and used my inhaler frequently.

We moved back to my hometown

After 3 years or so, we moved back to my hometown thinking that flatlands and the low altitudes might help. It got so bad again that my doctor sent me to National Jewish where I was diagnosed with COPD, exercise-induced asthma, and pulmonary hypertension.

Get tested for Alpha-1

If COPD runs in your family, get tested for Alpha-1. I do not have Alpha-1 antitrypsin deficiency, which is the genetic form of COPD. This can affect the lungs and the liver. Your doctor might recommend you being tested regardless of whether or not COPD runs in your family. Mine did anyway.

Smoking ruined my life as I knew it

With that I want you all to know that smoking ruined my life as I knew it. It’s no one’s fault but my own. I made the choice to smoke, even though it wasn’t willingly at first.

I’m sure there is more to the story. A printing company is where I worked for much of my life. There were many chemicals and fumes. I also worked in a bar with a lot of cigarette smoke in the air.

I slept in a room next to the ambulance bay and in a fire hall with a window opened to the area of the fire trucks. Working ambulance, I stood up near the fires. After using the ambulance, we filled vehicles with gas and/or diesel. On the 4th of July my hubby and I helped patrol the river so that people didn't get too close to the fireworks. I’m sure there is even more.

Not everyone with COPD has smoked

Any of these things could cause COPD. You see, not everyone with COPD has smoked. Second-hand smoke could have caused it, and so could my smoking. Does the cause matter? No, and knowing it won’t change my COPD diagnosis. So really, there is no one to blame but myself. I’ve made peace with it and decided that it’s time to live.

16 years and 5 months smoke-free

Today I am 16 years and 5 months smoke-free. Now my romance is with my husband. My breath is better, clothes smell cleaner, the air is fresher. I hope that you are able to see the danger of smoking, and how it can impact your life today and tomorrow. Think of your kids and grandkids, they want you around for a long time.

You are the only person who can decide that it’s time to quit, you have to make it happen. Even if you have COPD, you can hopefully slow the progression of your disease if you quit.

Remember, I’ve made peace with it and decided it’s time to live. Join me!