As Autumn Arrives
A year full of changes
I’ve made the decision not to return to the gym but will continue to exercise 5 days a week at home. I have a lot of equipment at home anyway. I think it is the safer option for a long while. Though I will miss the contact with friends, we can still chat online and support each other that way.
It makes such good reading through my journal of what I have done throughout the year (since March). I have not been out as much the last few weeks due to high anxiety with things going on in the outside world.
Preparing for the winter
Autumn is a good time with the cooler air. The sun still shines from time to time, which makes me smile. Autumn is also the time I start to prepare for winter. I find winter hard, though I know it isn't as bad as in some countries. It gets so cold and wet here. Even on a day that there is no rain, the air is damp. I have a sister who emigrated to Edmonton, Canada a good few years ago where it hits minus 29 or minus 30 and she says she would never come back to the UK to live. She finds it colder over here because of the continual dampness whereas there it is a dry cold.
Where I live, the rain is pretty constant which makes it difficult to get out and about. It affects my breathing, osteoporosis, and osteoarthritis. Luckily, I find having the internet keeps me in touch with the outside world, and our local community. Plus, I can keep in touch with family and friends. I always seem to err on the side of caution. Better to be safe than sorry.
It is your life
The only big drawback of not being able to get out is that you seem to get the feeling of being safer staying in than going out. It's a difficult situation, especially when you suffer from agoraphobia. Staying in is the worst thing to do. You need to do what you feel is right for you. There are no rights and wrongs - it is your life so you need to live it as it suits you best.
Right now with how things are, I'm tending not to go out much, though I do go in our front and back gardens, plus peg out the washing (if it's not raining). I've joined a couple of art classes online so that keeps my brain active. Plus, I'm doing my exercises and pushing myself to the limit. Then I write about it in my journal.
There are the odd days when I wish things were different. I wish I didn't have COPD but then if I hadn't got COPD I wouldn't be here writing this. Truth be told, I wouldn't be alive. I was so close to death. It's actually a bit scary to think how close I was. Now I look forward to seeing the seasons come and go and prepare ahead for the next one, eagerly waiting to see what they bring.
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